There’s a saying about poker: take a look around the table. If you can’t pick out who the sucker is, it’s probably you. About 60% of people say they work for a micromanager (or have) yet very few managers admit to being one. How can that be?
I perceive that our perception of what’s acceptable in a manager has changed in the last decade. As we’re living and working in an increasingly uncertain and dangerous world, we’re hoping for more emotional intelligence and psychological safety at work.
On behalf of all micromanagers, I’ll be the first to admit that I am one, at least some of the time. If you’re like me, and you want to improve your anxious and controlling tendencies, or learn how to survive under a witheringly heavy hand, please read on!
Be a Megamanager
My therapist (truly the world’s greatest) gave me this amazing metaphor for how an emotionally intelligent manager is meant to operate:
It’s like Uber. You can tell me where you want to go, but you don’t get to tell me how to get us there. If you want to drive, that’s fine — get your own car. If you want me to drive, you have to sit in the back.
This is related to the idea of “outcomes not output” which is a great mantra for managers looking to release themselves from controlling every aspect of what happens on their team. I should manage and measure my team according to the results we want to achieve, and not obsess over the ways and means of achievement.
Easier said than done!
I know that my most productive work as a manager is invested in the “why” and “what” of setting my team’s goals. When it comes to “how,” my respect for managers skyrockets when I see them focused on enabling their team, empowering them with trust and accountability, securing the resources they need, and anticipating and removing obstacles.
Under New Micromanagement
Not all of this perfectly applies in every situation, of course. In a smaller company, or in retail or a restaurant, managers often perform different functions. A sales manager or a real estate broker, for example, is often involved in the details of almost every transaction on their team.
Even in exceptional scenarios, there are few signals that raise the hackles of a workforce that’s grown allergic to micromanagement.
Here are the five signals I think indicate a diagnosis of micromanagement:
A sense of mistrust, suspicion, or uneasiness is reported, in both directions, in relationships between management and the team. A team under a micromanager rarely reports feeling understood, fairly measured, and appropriately recognized.
Managers carefully prescribe how work is meant to be done and poorly articulate the reasons for why it’s important. I once overheard this delightfully low-key indictment of an oppressive micromanager: “They highly value their own role in their team’s process of getting things done.”
A manager reacts over-reacts to mistakes, under-reacts to successes, and ignores or dismisses challenging questions. All of these undermine psychological safety, scientifically shown to correlate with positive outcomes in many professional settings. I’ve rarely encountered a micromanager who could also be described as self-aware or who was comfortable expressing vulnerability to their team.
A manager who insists that work must be re-done in order to comply with requirements that weren’t initially expressed. When I don’t get the outcome I hoped for, I’ll ask myself (and my team) what I could have done differently to close the gap between my expectations and reality. An “open door policy” isn’t enough to get honest feedback. Emotionally intelligent managers make it safe for ideas to be shared about how team dynamics can improve.
Most managers believe that they’ve clearly communicated their expectations to their team, and most CEO’s believe they’ve clearly articulated their vision for where the company is going. The data clearly show that neither are doing as good a job as they think. Every leader needs to continually re-calibrate these messages for each individual on their team, and ask for the feedback that proves that your messages is heard and understood.
Finally, I’m reminded of another favorite saying:
People don’t quit jobs, they quit bosses.
I can think of a couple of times that data on employee engagement and retention (turnover) gave pretty clear signals that micromanagers were on the loose. It’s not always easy to hear something you don’t want to believe, but it’s better than finding out the micromanager is you.